Within a week of the release of Nike’s  2010 World Cup  advert, the three-minute video broke previous viral records with an unprecedented 7.8million views. Nike’s marketing ploy seemed flawless. It glistened. It gleamed. It was a beautiful piece of cinematic editing. It had a great slogan (Write the Future). It featured some of the biggest superstars in world football (and Homer Simpson). It had the potential to be one of the greatest sports advertisements of all time.  

Yet Nike’s casting proved an unmitigated disaster. Let’s review the evidence.

‘Write the Future’- Starring:

Didier Drogba As one of Africa’s true global superstars, all eyes were on Drogba to turn on the style and carry the Ivory Coast through the opening rounds. The reality? Drogba fractured his elbow prior to his country’s opening match, plodded his way through three games with a protective cast on his arm and could not prevent the Ivory Coast’s group-stage elimination.

Write the Future rating: At the age of 32, this was surely Drogba’s final opportunity to make a lasting impression on the world’s greatest football stage. The pre-tournament elbow fracture was unfortunate- had Nike’s alleged curse set in early? The advert offered no vision of Drogba’s World Cup future… which was probably a very good thing in the end. 5/10

Fabio Cannavaro The veteran defender was awarded the FIFA Silver Ball for leading Italy to glory at the 2006 World Cup. Fast-forward to 2010 and with 36 years on the clock, captain Cannavaro does not offer the same reassuring presence at the back anymore. Failing to break down Paraguay was annoying. Failing to beat New Zealand was an embarrassment. And losing to Slovakia was a humiliation.

Write the Future rating: In the space of four years, Italy has gone from world champions to duds. Following his release from Juventus and an early World Cup exit, Cannavaro has decided to retire from international football and head to Dubai to wind down his career in the sunshine. Nike’s vision of crooners and acrobats heralding the Italian centre half appear a little off the mark right now. 3/10

Wayne Rooney Unfortunately for England, the tournament proved to be anything but an affirmation of Wayne’s World. Rooney started all four of England’s games, scoring precisely zero goals and was subdued throughout (with the exception of a live TV rant). The Sun newspaper confidently proclaimed England’s group    
E(ngland), A(lgeria), S(lovenia), Y(anks) prior to the tournament. A limp group-stage performance, followed by a 4-1 hammering from Germany helped disprove this theory.

Write the Future rating: Nike helpfully provided two alternative endings to Rooney’s World Cup fate. The first saw Rooney ridiculed by the press, causing a stock-market crash and street riots, forcing the Manchester United forward to Rooney to hide inside a worn-down caravan and sport a dishevelled beard. The second ending saw Rooney knighted by the Queen, and become the toast of the country. As Rooney has not been seen on these shores during the last week or so, bitter England supporters might prefer to subscribe to Nike’s vision of repentance.  6/10

Ronaldinho The Brazilian had a very quiet World Cup. It’s hard to criticise him though, considering he wasn’t in South Africa to start with.

Write the Future rating: It was a silly decision from Nike to include Ronaldinho in the advert. True, he remains the brand’s biggest selling Brazilian footballer, but it seemed strange to promote the individual talents of a player who was not even on the fringes of the squad. 0/10

Cristiano Ronaldo In fairness, Ronaldo led his country to an 8-0 victory over North Korea, and a couple of respectable draws against Brazil and the Ivory Coast. But this was not a vintage summer for Ronaldo, and during Portugal’s half-hour of need against Spain, the Portuguese performed impotently.  

Write the Future rating: Ronaldo was the key cast member of Nike’s advert and no-one can argue against his marketing pedigree. Ronaldo is arguably the world’s best player and certainly the most expensive. According to the ad, the poster-boy was supposed to set the tournament alight and have a 50ft statue erected in the centre of Lisbon. He didn’t and the statue isn’t forthcoming either.  4/10

The Under Cast Let’s not forget the other sportsmen who graced Nike’s big-budget disaster. They include:

Franck Ribery and Patrice Evra: Two of the main protagonists in the French World Cup capitulation. Apart from the on-pitch calamities (one draw, one goal, two defeats), the French completed their humiliation by refusing to train in protest against the French Football Federation’s decision to send Nicolas Anelka home for an expletive rant at the coach, Raymond Domenech.

Theo Walcott: An absentee in Fabio Capello’s 23-man squad. In the advert, Walcott failed to pick up Wayne Rooney’s wayward cross-field ball and stared forlornly as play continued without him. Sadly, it was the closest Walcott got to touching the ball at the World Cup finals.  

Roger Federer: The Swiss tennis star had his worst Wimbledon since 2002, falling to Tomas Berdych in the quarter-finals. Losing to Wayne Rooney at table tennis might not be in the realms of the ridiculous after all.

Kobe Bryant: The only cast survivor from Nike’s summer blockbuster flop. Voted MVP at the end of the NBA season for a second consecutive year, Bryant’s five second cameo did not prevent the LA Lakers from triumphing in the end-of-season playoffs.

While Nike have no control over the performances of these sportsmen, a bit of thought towards the ageing process (Cannavaro) and pre-tournament form (Ronaldinho) may have prevented the advert from featuring an entire group of players who would all exit by the second round. Nike could do worse than to send in Paul (the German psychic octopus) for advice when they produce their next superstar laden promotional advert for Euro 2012. Until then, the future is probably best left unwritten…